And in slightly related news, YAAAAAAAY, I finally have an icon with Kris in it! ...in a threesome with Gold and Silver, but it's more fun that way. xD  <---related 'cause it was in the post with with freaky JoBro!icon.

And, again, here's what the whole Crackerbarrel thing is about: LINK'D
 

Since I never seem to update this anymore, just thought I'd speak about what's going on.

My laptop chord is being wonky.  Something near the base where it plugs in ripped.  But if I position it juuuuust right, it'll be fine.  Until I trip over the chord for the millionth time. xP  Then I have to spend ten minutes trying to get it to work again. xP  We're going to get a new one soon, but it might be a bit pricey.

Also, MASSIVE amounts of inspiration suddenly came to me for a graphic novel.  I'm now working on the thumbnails (another word for rough draft) for it.  It's all a bunch of scribbles and I can barely read it, but at least it's porgress.

Not gonna say anything about the plot right now.  But that girl from that picture I drew is one of the main characters.

So, happy Don't Forget Day everybody!  For those who don't know, in the Fullmetal Alchemist series the main characters burned their house down so that they wouldn't try to turn back on what they decided to do.  That was on October 3, 1911 (or 1910, depending on the version), and FMA fans like myself tend to celebrate.  We call it both FMA Day and Don't Forget Day, the latter because Edward wrote "Don't Forget 3.Oct.11" in his State Alchemist watch so that everytime he looked at the time, he would remember why he was on his journey.

It's not just about celebrating a crucial moment in the series.  This day represents new beginnings and turning our backs on the past so that we may walk forward with no regrets.  But, at the same time, we can't forget how we got here, or everything will unravel and we'd just end up back where we started.

I'm gonna try. :)

Anyway, going to North Carolina sometime in November.  Grandparents are going to some reunion, and hopefully, I won't. :P  But... They're talking about getting on a plane.  Which is freaking me out.  My panic attacks are one of the things I'm going to try to get away from, but I don't know if I'll be able to do it in a month.  Last night I heard some loud bang, and with the moon glowing the way it was, I seriously though that aliens were coming.  Yeah.  I told you my paranoia was crazy. xP  I think I'm just going to suck it up though and get on the plane.  Please pray nothing happens, and that my paranoia will settle by then.

Yeah, haven't posted in a while.  I really don't like posting meaningless posts, but that's all I can give. ;_;

Well, anyway, bought a couple of books.  Watchmen and Mangaka America.  Haven't really read Watchmen yet.  But OMG tha Mangaka America book is amazing!  It's about graphic novelists who are into manga and are influenced by it.  There's lots of amazing art in it and a lot of tutorials.  It's totally inspiring too.  God... I used to be one of those obnoxious weabos who looked down upon Americans who made "manga", but now it's like, whatever.  haha.  (Still look down on American animation that is obviously purposely ripping off the "anime style", since they're just looking for money.  Except Ben 10.  Ben 10 is awesome. xD)  They even had an article about how manga was just a word and it doesn't matter how anybody uses it.  That was great. 

Now I'm doing all kinds of scribbling thanks to that.  I swear, I'll finish somethign and scan it some day so that everyone can see. D:

I'm starting to sense a pattern.  It's well into the night, and I'm starting to freak out again.

This hasn't been this bad in years, these days my attacks only last a day or two, but it's been longer than that.

I really want it to stop so I can sleep.

I don't know how it happened, but here...

twitter.com/krisbambii

Thought I'd wait til I had a mobile phone, but oh well. :/

Seriously.  The panic attacks.  Why?

God...  It's rainy tonight, and every single noise coming from outside has me fearing the end of the world.  Every crash of thunder, the sound of cars going by, the train off in the distance, planes flying over head.  Every single thing has me freaked out.  I'm crying on and off.  And I'm so sick of this. 

It's 3:30 in the morning, btw.

I tried going to sleep, but of course my mind is plaging me with all these 'what if' thoughts.  I don't even know if this is what you'd call a panic attack.  But I hate it, and I want it to stop.  It's all so rediculous, I know none of it's going to happen just like that, but my mind refuses to quit torturing me.  I don't want to be afraid anymore.

Why did this have to happen to me again?  And now of all times?  Five years later.  WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?

I'm going insane.  Not the good kind.

Bugs.

Natural disasters.

Spiders.

WHY DID I MOVE HERE?!?! Dx  And why did my panic attacks have to start up again? ;_;

Whatever was wrong with my foot is now better! :D

But I almost pulled my arm out of it's socket while STRETCHING, so now that hurts. D: One thing after another...

At least I beat the E4 in Pokemon Platinum!!! *throws excess happiness around*

 

Dear God, wtf is wrong with me? xDDD  I should not be left alone with paint, ever.
 

Yay.  Second year writing.

Now I have to figure out what I'm going to do.  I'm not sure about doing the one I told Wilson about, because now I feel unoriginal, and I just dont feel like yaoi right now. :/  But I don't know what else to do.  Not to mention there's a big fanfic (or two) that I'm working on. 

But yeah.  Yay.  OH!  And I got purple nail polish today. :D 
 

"When we're shoving hot dogs into condoms, that when you know to get out."
--Conan O'Brian